Prehensile_cloaca

This is why “eye witness testimony” can never be trusted. People with fucked up physiology just tumbling through life and not even realizing that their color wheel is off by magnitudes, and that cilantro is delicious.

5’3

Capulets and Montagues, but like, way dumber.

I assume this must be what Jolene looked like too

Yeah, but he’s probably in really good shape now. Massive calves

ghost smirk

She reserves #8 for high holy days

“And that’s why I have to decline your full Catholic mass wedding, sorry.”

Life, uh, finds a way

Going to assume you’re just trauma venting, because clearly toddlers should be eating all the time; they’re small and have small systems, whereas adults can almost always eat enough food to sustain them for 4-5 hours, with a basic understanding of nutrition.

Anyway, sorry your mom was the way she was.

Don’t invite this person. They’ll make errands that should be an hour into a 3 hour escapade while complaining every 25 minutes about being hungry and wanting snacks.

Eat a whole fucking meal, like an adult.

And crowing

Or they will…

If you leave them be for a while, do you return to find masses of pie? Because that how you solve world hunger.

Ah, a 2mo old account slop from Reddit? Say less.

Maybe we should stop licking the boot of the tools of Capitalists explicitly designed to remove humanity from the human experience.

Yah, you fill the handle with gasoline and you’re ready to hit the town.

Bro can hold his breath for at least 20 minutes

Who?

What’s the deaf man’s profession?